August 2009

Goodbye to Summer

August 31, 2009

I fell apart one night (unless sobbing is a type of meditation, which my friend Eric tells me it is) and my son Max offered me sage advice. “Do something joyful,” he told me. “Something that makes you happy.” Summer is almost over, so I’m going to get to work on that.

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Drifting with Eric Clapton

August 30, 2009

Living with the blues, I search for them on Youtube. And Clapton sings them for me.

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Andy

August 30, 2009

Trapped in sadness about my mother, my father is also on my mind a lot. Which is why I find myself searching for Andy Williams online. When he pops up in his skinny Mad Men tie and young face, I cry. I watched Andy Williams with my father every Sunday night.

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Living In the Moment

August 30, 2009

On the way home from Martha’s Vineyard,  I visit my mother. I try to focus on her peacefulness, her lack of anguish or pain. But her life seems so lonely. She is drifting away. One minute she tells me “I’m the baby. Everybody takes care of me.” But then she’s my mother again, giving me [...]

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My Father Resurfaces

August 29, 2009

I sit down on the beach to meditate and my father, gone for twenty years,  resurfaces. Out on the horizon, where he used to go deep sea fishing, he speaks to me. “Look at all these waves. Heartache after heartache, sorrow after sorrow, problems and crises… billions keep coming.” A whitecap in the distance seems [...]

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Let It Be(ach)

August 28, 2009

I know I’m supposed to learn how to let go of attachments… But what about my attachment to my loved ones? It’s ferociously strong, especially on overcast days while they’re bodysurfing in pre-hurricane waves. I much prefer quieter beach days:

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Walking Meditation

August 27, 2009

Leaving the beach one day, I finally got the hang of walking meditation…

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Easy Does It

August 26, 2009

I’m lulled into a trance on Martha’s Vineyard.

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The Lazy Drift of Thoughts

August 26, 2009

In her wonderful memoir, Faith, Sharon Salzberg described meditating as “observing the lazy drift of thoughts coming and going in my mind.” (Her book packs and delivers a powerful punch, but you’ll have to read my book to see where and when I get hit…shameless tease, sorry.)

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Blue Skies (for a while)

August 26, 2009

Meditating comes easy on gorgeous summer days.

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